First off…I’m grateful for what I have and where I am late on this Thanksgiving. Mom’s knee surgery went well, and within weeks, she’ll be up and about and moving pain-free.
How do you chat up those supposedly impenetrable, supposedly stoic introverts? Check it out here. It really isn’t that hard, just don’t bore and don’t pound us with the “why aren’t you having fun” questions..
A couple of months ago, I went out on a couple of dates. Attractive, lively woman who’s a college administrator. First date went well–we talked for four hours, and could have talked more. Second date–dinner, jazz (a big band she liked), drinks after. Both went well, and of course I felt a third date was in the offing.
Eh, no. She didn’t feel a romantic connection. Really? Two dates, nine hours total, and you know this? I’ve been sold short before, and it always stings. And to top it off, I got the “we can still be friends but understand if it’s awkward” routine. This is where I lost it. I felt like there was something there (enough that, if it had legs, I’d take her to Paris). I felt something in me starting to build in me toward her and was looking forward to seeing what happened. For me to pretend I was a friend but suppress any deeper feelings isn’t awkward, it’s lying to me and to her. (e.g., Be my friend, but you can’t act upon or even acknowledge any feelings.)
Anyway, I continue to want to be the good guy, and to understand that the race is long. Much longer than nine hours. Unlike the writer of the post, I think there is a life partner out there for me. But I won’t accept what’s not good for me.